Thursday, March 19, 2009

Traffic Experiment – Update

As you all know, I ran an experiment a few weeks back where I slipped the phrase “Miley Cyrus Nude” into a post just to see how many hits I got from perverts searching said phrase.

So far…zip, zero, nada. No hits for “Miley Cyrus Nude”. So this could lead you to believe people just aren’t as fucked up as you would think.

Guess again junior. May I present the following keyword searches that led people to Bob’s Bar and Grill:

Turtlerapeshoe” – You know, I can’t really fault them for this one. That’s just pee your pants funny.

Man Nipples” – I kinda wish this one was a little more specific. This could very well be some concerned housewife whose husband has a medical problem in the nippular region. But, we all know it was some sick fuck with a hairy nipple fetish.

“Earn by doing job in bear bar” – This search is a prime example of why spelling is so important in school today. While this poor dumb bitch was probably trying to figure the ins and outs of getting an honest job at the local titty bar, she’s now relegated to serving salmon martinis to ungrateful Ursinae at the Kodiak Club. Fuckin’ bears, we need to run them out of this country.

…and my personal favorite.

“American girll fuc” – Some poor fuckin’ Iranian learned almost enough English to go on the internet and find him some good old red, white and blue ‘batin pics…and what does he get? My fat ass. Yeah, Fuck you too.

Fuckin’ Iranians…they’re almost as bad as bears.

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